I just recently turned 18 years of age and have been an honor/AP student my entire life. My final grade point of average throughout the duration of high school was a 96. Next year I will be attending college as an honors student with a 25,000 annual merit scholarship. As of late I have no aspirations of going to school and feel that this could be in jeporady. Perhaps summer?

I have never spoke about any of these problems as I don't want to blacklisted by anyone or anything in the near future as many people are victim of.
As a child I was disciplined physically and mentally which is standard as my parents are both immigrants from the Dominican Republic. When I get into fights with my parents, which as of late, has been frequent, it gets bad, for lack of a better word. I have never hit either of my parents but the verbal altercations get to a point that worries them. Shortly after these fights I have deep deep feelings of resentment towards them. When I was around 15 I would often tell myself that I am going to move out and run away but this is no longer. I still get deep feelings of hatred towards them. I had been a binge and purge eater on and off and would often cycle between this last year.

I am often called handsome but regard myself as shy with people who I don't know. I would describe my self confidence level as constantly cycling from high to low. I love to drive fast and am fascinated by cars and how they work and often find myself driving considerably recklessly. I have a need for speed. I often, although unintentionally, scare others who are in the car. When I was younger, about 15 I often had suicidal thoughts after fights with my parents, but never considered actualization. I wouldn't consider myself close to either of my parents or my 14 year old sister but I love them and would do anything for them. To them I am a normal 18 with aspirations to become a doctor who at times can be irritable at times but nothing more. I consider myself a very social person and am very friendly with people. But I feel like I have this dark side that makes me different. I go into these periods where I can be normal one moment and love live and then suddenly I became resentful, engage in impulsive behaviors whether it be binge drinking/eating, reckless driving, and or spending money. I have had a girlfriend here and there but nothing serious but I often hook up with women. I am the opposite of clingy. I am very good at hiding these symptoms but want to know if I am bipolar or something. Thank your for taking the time to read this post.