What would you be risking if you asked? Things aren't going to get much worse than they already are, right? She could say no, but she also might appreciate that you want to remember and honor your grandmother.

I'm another exile. My extended family is great, it's just that my dad was in the Air Force and we moved the the other side of the world when I was 11 and being the oldest child of two oldest children, most of my cousins are at least 10 years younger than me or more, and my parents didn't communicate with me for decades, so I just don't have relationships with anyone because I didn't have opportunity. When my grandfather died, my parents wouldn't let me ask for anything that anyone else wanted. My grandfather made violins and painted. I had asked him to teach me to play the violin when I was 9 years old and he said that I was too young. I started to learn to play a few years after he had died. When my aunt realized that my branch of the family didn't have any of my grandfather's violins, she gave me one. I love it, and I think of my grandfather every time I play it. I still wish that I had relationships with my family and I don't know how to do that, but I'm glad for the violin.

You never know. Will you regret asking or not asking more a few years from now?