You can draw lines and have boundaries all you want but as with every decision it has consequences. If you say no to this friend that what about the next one? Is he allowed to be upset about losing this connection? What if he begins to feel resentment towards her for forcing him to cut it off.

I don't know him. Maybe he is going to cheat, maybe he already has, maybe he never will but from what she has said he hasn't done anything and doesn't intend on it. I spent the first 10 yrs of my marriage under the accusation that I had cheated or was going to. There was no reason for my wife to think I was cheating but she was continually suspicious. Checking my e-mails, texts, listening in on phone calls and as soon as she found something she could construe into something bad she confronted me and we fought. This was a constant thing. In her mind every woman I talked to was a potential threat and it started with ex-girlfriends and then grew from there. These days with facebook and every other social network it is hard to not be in contact with ex's on some level. This is the main reason why there are problems in my relationship.

I know my history and what I have done but I also know that when you are under constant suspicion of cheating when you are innocent it takes a toll and you begin to wonder what the point of staying faithful is. To this day I wonder how things would have been had we not fought about those things and I had felt trusted. People say that I lost her trust but the fact of the matter is that I never had it.

This is why I preach that you should always trust and assume things are fine unless confronted with real evidence. Its a bad evil world and we always have a tendency to protect ourselves from what we think might happen. There is nothing wrong with that at all but when you start creating evidence or rationalizing it to point towards a result that you have preconceived then it has moved from self preservation to self destruction. Everyone deserves to be happy but the only person that can make you happy is you.

If she goes ahead and allows him to cut off communication with his ex then 2 things will happen either 1) She thinks its ok to dictate who he can associate with and it creates problems down the road when she has a problem with someone else or 2) He continues to talk to his ex behind her back which regardless of it stays innocent or not is not a good thing because it will come out eventually.

You may not agree with it but thats my opinion. Never meant to offend anyone, sorry if I have.