[quote=nushi;3875558]

14 years of my life have been wasted, & I don't have a life anymore, no friends no family no degree no nothing, & I can't find proper therapy! Or is it that I don't have enough will to find therapy? Or is it that my OCD keeps stopping me from continuing to find proper therapy? Or what or what or what? I don't know what to do anymore with my life…

Hello Nushi: Unfortunately I can't speak knowledgeably with regard to mental health services in Egypt. So I can't comment with regard to the difficulty you've had finding affordable therapy services. It is the case that psychiatrists in the U.S. also mostly just prescribe medications. They don't do psychotherapy.

It sounds to me as though you are struggling mightily with various forms of OCD. You're also isolated having no friends & no family. So I would imagine you are also probably struggling with depression & possibly with anxiety too. All of those things put together are a heavy load to bear under the best of circumstances.

You are certainly to be commended for trying to do your own therapy through self-education. But I would suspect that the depression & anxiety you experience, along with your OCD probably do make it difficult to keep up a sustained effort. However, personally I think trying to address your mental health struggles only through self-education is probably just not enough. You need professional help. Most of us do. This is not a failing on your part. It's just the way it is. Don't feel badly about it. You can feel proud you tried!

I noted, in your post, you mentioned the cost for e-mail therapy. I don't know if this is the way therapy is typically done in Egypt. But, if possible, I would encourage you to try to find some in-person therapy services. I guess some people do have success with on-line therapy. But I think, for the most part, in-person therapy is generally more effective. Are there therapists you could see in person where you live?

You don't say, in this post, if you have a job or other source of income. You did mention you have no degree. In the U.S., depending on where a person lives, sometimes there are clinics that offer either free mental health services or services provided on a sliding-fee basis depending on a person's income. Might there be such services available in Egypt?

This is about all I have to offer, Nushi. Do keep posting here on PC too. It helps to write about your struggles. And perhaps there will be other PC'ers who will have better suggestions to offer than mine. My best wishes to you.