My mom experienced similar with her third husband. I know he had suffered a traumatic brain injury in adulthood. Yet, went well beyond that. She would tell me, how behind closed doors the angry, gruff façade would come off, into a weeping willow. I remember she'd spend hours scouring the help ads, trying to match various opportunities to meet his needs/demands. I know, he's currently under treatment for a type of mood disorder, actually have the doctors reports as he'd sent with an apology letter for his behavior to both my uncle and myself, a couple years ago. Word, from my gram, is that he still doesn't have steady employment, he's in his early 60's, now.

Of course, there's resentment that grows. Building a future involves active participation on both sides.

Choosing men, for me, in my own life, involves choosing men, regardless of industry, that just work through the p****** and moaning of a hard day. Work isn't easy. After the double recessions and near depression of the start of the millennium, perspective is, beggars cannot be choosers, and sometimes starting at the bottom can lead to more. Gosh, I even have had moments where I'd love to walk away. My integrity remains, even if I've momentarily felt it wouldn't by virtue of sticking it out. Realized sometimes bad days trickle down and around the workplace.
He may need to work through the ego/pride and find value in the paycheck. Yet, only he can do that. Can lead a horse to water, but cannot make them drink.
Somewhere in his core, he may believe he's always got a soft pillow to soften the blow when he's not an active participant in the labor force.