That is not loving him; he has needs and interests that are not yours or related to your pregnancy/fetus and your feelings about your experience. You had sex with him 3 times when you were both drunk and one of those times resulted in a pregnancy which you aborted. He was never a responsible partner and neither were you. I would continue to work on you, not pay any attention to his actions as you do not respect him or his judgment (with good reason in my opinion) and concentrate on your own self esteem rather than someone else's opinion of you. "He" is a stranger to you. Shift your focus to you and what you can do something with/about.