My girlfriend and I have been together for 2 years and have been living together for a year and in the beginning meaning until Jan of this year we were great! We went on trips around the world, had adrenaline rushing adventures and just enjoyed being around each other. When we came home from one of our travels at the beginning of this year that's when the stresses started. We went from being able to do anything to trying to figure out how we were going to pay bills for the following month.
When the stresses started so did the lack of sexual drive on my girlfriend's end. The intimacy started to fade, I started to get annoyed by how much she partied and how she wouldn't come home at the end of the night and so on. Even with the stresses I was still trying to shower her with gifts and romantic things around the house (special dinners, bubble baths after work, etc) none of these things seemed to be helping in addition to me beginning to truly feel taken advantage of. She would only vocally say thank you and that was it and it made me think back to the trips and adventures that I had paid for that she had only just said "thank you".
I love being romantic and I like for romantic things to happen for me and she just wasn't giving them to me. But I love her. I just recently brought this up...feeling taken for granted and she hit me with the water ballon of "I don't know if I'm IN love with you but I do love you."
I asked her what she wanted to do and she replied with "do people ever truly STAY in love? I know plenty of couples who fall in and out of love all the time but that doesn't mean they love or care for each other any less." Which is true, my mother is living proof of that but right now I'm not sure how to handle this whole thing. I feel rejected on top of still feeling taken for granted.
She said she wants to try to work it out by being a little more appreciative and if it works out it does and if it doesn't it doesn't. I don't like her nonchalant attitude towards this whole thing but I know she's right. My only issues with her is that I don't feel appreciated anything else is very minor to me aside from the "I love you but I'm not IN love with you" statement she hit me with.
I guess the over all question I'm asking is: are there others who have fallen in and out of love with their partners and somehow the relationship just continues to work? Is it still possible that we could find the spark again? She says she still has romantic feelings towards me and still sees me sexually attractive. Any help would in fact help me right now.
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