I think the reason this is bothering me so much is because it finally made me realize that there is no real friendship here.

For the past five years, his mental health has declined. He's suffered from increasingly bizarre paranoid delusions. For a year now, something always comes up when we plan to get together (we live in different states). At the same time that he hides his marriage and refuses to see me when we are in the same town, he continues to send me long, incoherent emails on a regular basis.

I have been making excuses for this behavior due to his mental state, but now I am seeing it in a new light.