Dear ClemFan,

I like the reply," Just remember that "What they're thinking is none of my business" and carry on the best you can. It's none of their concern. by birdpumpkin, thanks"

I'm too dealing with self worth issues. I have all the compassion in the world for everyone else except myself.
It is growing process, remember you have 5 children who are watching how You respond to situations and circumstances. So be aware of what you are demonstrating "catch yourself". Try to keep the energy in the house light. You are the only one who keeps order in the house. Kids need rules, boundaries, and age app responsibilities like household chores ect... and rewards like acknowledgement of job well done. Encouragement goes a long way. Ask the kids to write down what they like/want to do.
Not materialistic things. Discipline without punishment, watch your wording such as calling a child bad boy/girl. Punishment relates to being bad. Instead explain "you are not following the rules of the house and the consequences will be xyz.

Go outside and throw a ball or do some age appropriate things with the kids. These are the things they will remember and their smiles and laughter will last forever. If physically you cannot partake watching them is 2nd best.

As YOU explained it is the feeling of SHAME that is fueling the feelings of Unworthiness.
Shame should be felt justifiably if You did something wrong.
Or is it the embarrassment from getting food stamps?
I see it you are doing everything to keep food on the table ! That is a honorable thing.
There are many other resources you and the household qualify for, as long as you keep your disability case open.
Shame belong to those who judge you but You have to believe that, also what birdpumpkin said about others.

It seems to me that you have many skills in an industry that is lacking efficient/knowledgeable people like you with experience. Seek out supervisor positions.
Take out a notebook and be proactive.
Happiedasiy