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Suzy5654 said:
Met the marr. counselor & I'm just not ready to be in a room with my husband being totally honest. What kind of criticism would he say?

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Suzy, maybe you and your husband (or just you) can see the marriage counselor individually first. My T does couples counseling and I have been seeing him for individual therapy for 6 months now. He's fine with it. Many people need to work on their marriage in individual therapy first before doing couples (or they may never even get to couples therapy). My T would like to do some couples therapy, maybe 1-3 sessions, with me and my husband. I've been terrified of this from the moment I started therapy with him, but I see now it may have some value, and I am working on that suggestion. T is helping me deal with my worries/fears so that it will achieve my goals. There are certain things he can do in couples therapy that I either say "yes" to or "no" to. He doesn't have to use certain approaches that I know are not ones I want to experience. He is very sensitive to my needs. I'm not sure he would have been this way if I had just jumped into couples therapy without doing individual therapy with him first. Anyway, sorry to sidetrack this thread, but Suzy, maybe consider doing individual therapy with your marriage counselor first.

Another idea--If you tell your marriage counselor your fears about couples therapy, she may be able to help you two learn to communicate appropriately in your first session, so that no criticisms occur. My T says his first session with a new couple is always about communication and he teaches the couple how to do it. He says it only takes one session, then they can start working on the problems.