"so far"----it sounds like you have come a long way-----& we all have a long journey, no matter how short the road...
(((hug)))----I scare people when I get hypomanic (& of course this upsets me because I am feeling GOOD right then...)
I have also had the experience of raging---when I was younger---once in a very great while it peeks around the corner----& then I know I am in the wrong place/with the wrong person/people. It is Very frustrating to lose control---and to see others upset---I know that, when young, I used to be unable to recall what triggered me--and therefore, I could not imagine it happening again ("Who was that person?")--made it a long hard time to change...