Something tells me that you won't change. I needed two weeks to come to acceptance that it was over, and I've gotten this far, I refuse to go back to vulnerability and insecurity. The fact that I am waiting for you to turn around and give up on me yet again, is just indicative of the lack of trust I now have in you. You tell me to feel these things and to forget about it if I can't over my feelings. But it is not my responsibility to rebuild the trust you destroyed. And if you walk away or find someone else, it will be proof that I was right all along not to trust your whimsical, emotionally abusive self. Yes, I feel so angry still. And I'm not about to get over it if you do nothing to change and fix what you screwed up. No one should have to lose someone before they realise how much they meant to them.

Right now, all I am doing is keeping the peace because I can't be screwed feeling **** again. I also won't break off the friendship because I still have faith in you as a friend and I am not a cruel person. But I refuse to argue or to deal with the pain you constantly gave me in the past. If what it takes to stay happy is to keep things to myself, and to refuse to see you, that is what I must do. There is nothing I can do to change that.