Thank you for all the amazing response in this thread. I feel that I have learned a lot by just reading them. I notice that a lot of people here really found a way to depend on their T's emotionally, and were thus able to heed their T's guidance. I think the trouble for me is that I don't ever give my T the opportunity to give me much guidance. I haven't really allowed myself to need her. I've been in therapy for a long time so I kind of know the in's and outs of the anylitic framework (and I'm just analytic in general so I anticipate the arguments T's make), and I wind up doing most of that kind of work in my own head, so I end up feeling like I don't need my T. I've also had some bad luck with T's and have felt like it was all up to me to figure out how to heal, which I think I have done for myself some, but I'm realizing now that its never going to get all the way better unless I let someone else help me. I think Frog said it best when he said that Trust is the <3 of therapy. Thank you everyone for responding to this thread, I'm sure that I will want to look at it several more times as I'm going through the process of learning to trust another.