My partner and I talk about how we feel broken most of the time. and she has told me my spirit was broken a long time ago by very bad ppl but I escaped. And since then I have been putting the broken back together. She says I've done something none of those toxic ppl have ever been able to do and that is make my own chance for happiness. I escaped I found a good partner. We don't drink or do drugs or fight. I've learned to talk to her about things in a way ie never been able to speak to another. She understands and is my support as well as her family. My toxic friends and family are miserable and they see any shred of happiness for me and try to ruin it.

I've now shut those ppl out and I am seriously thinking of blocking them or changin my number. They push and push thinkin I'll come back to them like the empathetic child I was but instead they are pushin me away cuz I couldn't care less if anything happened to them now.

As for cryin, I don't really know what I'm afraid of. I just have a very hard time crying even in intense physical pain. I bury it all and it's just how it's always been done.