I read that and instantly started explaining the difference between monologue and dialogue to the invisible man.

I hear some people say that they enjoy the mania state, but I find it horrible. Right now I'm so charged that it feel like if I touch something it's going to explode, but I also know that there a whole lot of pain bearing down on me. I'm in for a long exhausting night, with nothing to distract me from endless rumination and anxiety. Then tomorrow I'm going to be so low I'll want to die. Everything is going to feel pointless and futile then. Everything DOES feel pointless and futile now, it's just that the package is in the mail. Then, I'm going to hit my base-line after a week or so of being numb and depressed and my Schizo-delusions are going to kick in. I'll be like that for a few months, trying to get all the plates spinning once more (most of which are smashed on the floor), till my next trigger comes along and the whole, inescapable cycle starts over.

I wish I had a friend to help me through this, but there's no one. Just me alone the house. Unable to form a relationship or build any sort of life for myself because the wind keeps blowing down my house of cards.

****...