Welcome to PC! Sorry you are feeling so anxious about this.

I have to say that the scenario doesn't make a ton of sense to me (that'd be good news -- in case it didn't sound like it). One thing to set your mind at ease….BP II is the more common for having long bouts of depression. Therefore, it would not be an indicator of it "actually" being BP I, so you can relax on that front.

You have been dx'd BP II, but you refer to both hypomania and mania. Might you be referring to differing intensities of hypomania? (Because BP II by definition doesn't have full mania.*) I'm guessing there might be some confusion there, and that maybe it's part of your worry. Your doc is right -- BP is cyclical, which is good to be reminded of in depressive phases, because at those times, it tends to feel like it will "always" be that way, right? Perhaps in saying you could (could, not will) have a "manic episode" after a depression he merely meant "upswing" (and not mania per se). (?) It might just as well be that you have an even mood state following the depression. We can spend time there too, right? Sure! And you have fairly recently, so if you can think on those things, maybe it will help. Also, in reading, it seems that you might be correlating the lengths of the phases(??) (ie. you fear a "long" manic episode. Why long?) If so, it may help to know that it doesn't tend to work that simply.

Is your diagnosis relatively new? (Last couple of years, or does it go way back?) If new(ish), remember -- there can be a lot of new information to integrate, and it can certainly take awhile to see if we tend toward patterns, and if so, what they are. Be gentle with yourself. Whether the dx is new to you or not, you might find it helpful to look at this through CBT, as it can help identify reflexive thinking and possible catastrophic thought patterns. I'm not saying you are having those, just that when we're having a ton of anxiety over something, it's worth looking into, because it's got the potential to help a lot.



(I've got BP II too, and experience a substantial range in intensity of hypomania and certainly appreciate the challenge of trying to express the high end of it, you know? So I do get that it doesn't have to be mania to be very damaging. Just for starters, there's quite a few thousands of dollars I'd like back . )