I have been in therapy for over a year. I started going because of depression. I didn't realize before I started therapy that I am in a verbally/emotionally abusive marriage. I can see now it has been since the beginning. No matter what goes wrong I am always to blame. I just can't do anything good enough for him no matter how hard I try. My self esteem is down to nothing. I have been trying so hard to gain a little of it back. I get so afraid of him when he gets mad. I never know what he is going to do. He has never hit me. He only pushed me once. I haven't had friends since we got married. I do still see my family, not as often as I like. I visit them when he is at work. I am not supposed to go anywhere or talk on the phone until all my work is done the way he wants it done. When he asks me a question I am supposed to answer him right away, if I don't, he gets very mad. When I do answer, he twists my words and uses them against me. I am not allowed to ask him questions. I just can't make the decision to leave. I feel I have to stay for my kids, until they are out of school. They want us to stay together. He keeps telling me how good I have it, that I have nothing to be depressed about. Sorry I kept babbling.