Hell,I knew the answer to that as soon as I read it.
Thus: "Addicted To Unhappiness" by Martha and
William J. Pieper. I know it sounds crazy, but it is
a error we made when we were children which is
lodged in the subconscious,which is why we don't
know we are doing it. The book actually says what
you said, 'the misery can be comforting'. Get it asap
to start recovery.
Kind Regards,
BLUEDOVE