I'm not sure if i've ever had full blown mania or if it's just been severe hypo. I've had the no sleep, racing thoughts, multiple projects, hypersexual, over spending etc. i'm usually a bit mixed, so even when i have all those symptoms and my mood is elevated. i'll also be suicidal, which is weird. I'm also not sure if i've had psychosis, or if my thoughts just got intense and weird. Whenever i'm really unwell i start to believe that i am fighting against demons in a battle for my soul. The reason i'm not sure if it's really psychosis is that even when that seems real, i maintain some degree of doubt and knowledge that it might not be true. But then even when i'm well, i wonder if it is partially true. So who knows. It's either psychosis or fixed false beliefs - i'm not sure where the line is. Whatever it is that happens, it can get very intense and every time i manage to destroy parts of my life quickly with impulsive bad decisions and risk taking.