My family used and uses guilt to get me to do what they want me to do, and that guilt often makes me feel like I'm a bad person, even when I know there's no logical or sensible reason for it. Religious guilt, personal guilt, it's all very destructive.

I did some things that weren't nice, or were simply wrong, and even did some things wrong not by intent but by carelessness. Those are things I do regret, particular when I've hurt someone without meaning to.

I don't know how not to feel regret; I've tried to change that about myself, but I guess too many people have told me how bad I am, how insensitive, how uncaring, how selfish, how stupid, how mean, etc., I am. Most are people who can't fathom what it's like to have OCD. People who think I don't care about my mom, and that I don't feel guilty that I can't do more to help her. I love my mom, but she did some abusive things to me, but nobody wants to acknowledge or believe that.

Not just my mom, to be fair. My dad, too. When I was a kid, he told me I'd better not pee in bed again (I didn't have a chronic problem with it, but it happened sometimes), or he'd wipe the pee or poop in my face. I peed, and he wiped my panties in my face. I told that to my mom's religious friend, and she LAUGHED. People told me I deserved some of the abusive things that happened to me. I HATE these people.

To sum up, I wish I could tell you how to not regret your actions and thoughts, and how to forgive yourself for mistakes, and stop blaming yourself for things that weren't your fault, but I'm unable. For what it's worth, though, you're not alone.