There's nothing wrong with you, seeker. As long as your art fulfills you, that's all that matters.

I can understand why your professor is encouraging the students to enter competitions, though. For the younger students, getting some awards to list on their CV will help them out in their careers. I work for a visual arts university that I graduated from 10 years ago. There's a lot of emphasis on getting the students to seek awards and recognition and learning how to market their art so they can make a living as artists after graduation.

It sounds like you've already been there and done that and your professor should understand that. I lost interest in awards quite a while ago too. Last year, I won an award for a poster design and my boss excitedly announced that it was going to be part of an exhibition in Brussels. My first question was, "Do I get a free trip to Brussels to go to the exhibition?" The answer was NO. Then I asked, "Is there a cash price attached to this award?" The answer was NO, so my reaction was, pfffft. I couldn't care less about having yet another framed certificate -- just one more award to clutter up my closet.

I decided long ago -- shortly after I started my career -- that my drawing and painting were for me only. I had been doing illustration for clients, but I realized in a very short while that tailoring my creativity to the needs and vision of a client were taking all the joy out of the process for me. So, I stuck with being a designer, but had to keep something just for myself -- something I could do to fulfill my own needs.

I spent much of my childhood performing in music festivals -- voice and piano. I stopped when I was 18, though. My father still doesn't understand why I don't want to "share" my talents with an audience any more. I don't need the applause, though. Music is something I do for my own soul. My soul and my creativity don't need an audience. I don't need praise from others -- that's not the part of being creative that brings me joy.

I don't think I'm burned out at all... and I don't think you are either. As we get older and wiser we have a better understanding of our needs and a better understanding of the role our own creativity plays in our lives. It sounds to me like you know what you hope to get from your creative pursuits -- and garnering awards and recognition from other people isn't part of it. If entering competitions is only going to use up your precious time and there's nothing in it that's going to fill a need in you, then why bother? I think you're too wise -- and you know yourself too well -- to waste your time and energy in that way.