I'm not managing all my emotional s--t very well. My last trauma memory causes me to dissociate if I even think of it. I'm a mess. My T visits are too far apart to be of any real help. I went to the MH crisis centre last Tuesday and they just sent me home with suicidal thoughts and no follow up instructions. I had to email my T to see if they even sent him a report. They sent him one but not my pdoc. They said they made a med change but didn't give me a prescription. My T said in his email I could do the change when I see my pdoc in 3 weeks. I can't wait 3 weeks! Called the pdoc and he's going call the MH centre for the report. I'm on the verge of tears every day and can barely get through the day. Then, to top it off, our house was vandalized on Saturday when a drunk woman from a party next door smashed our front window with a bottle.

With the report mix up and how I'm feeling, which is like a bag of crap, I'm totally ready to pack it in. I'm going no where fast with all this. Nothing is really being accomplished. I'm getting more help on PC then I am any where else. I want to stop therapy altogether but I'm now too attached to my T to leave him. I'm between a rock and very hard f--king place.