Following post is a mix... positive and bad

Yesterday was hellish, was crying so much... saw Dr and was told I would remain on level 2a (10 min observations, no walks) and I was feeling even crappier. Got angry at one point and shouted at one of the nursing managers after he had been a bit short with me about why I was being restricted in this way.

Discovered that there was a good chance I could successfully discharge myself if I so chose and I was very close to doing so. Found the irony to be delicious - wasn't allowed off the grounds while under their care due to liability and negligence if something went wrong... but should I discharge myself 'against medical advice' and then went and did something... then that was fine.

Was so angry and determined... and tired and not thinking. Was talked down by a slightly more companionate nurse who took the time to calm me down and make me listen to reason... to stay here and get the help I needed.

That night was prescribed a sleeping tablet and for the first time in a month slept for 7 hours... and have been off and on sleeping all day. Body and brain obviously had had enough and needed to catch up.

Have had some intrusive thoughts but for the most part as said, been asleep and right now feeling pretty decent.