Hi Partless, welcome to PC and the PTSD forum. I am sorry you have been struggling so much and feeling alone with it too.

When we are growing up we trust our parents to know how to "fix" things. After all they are grownups, don't grownups just know? Well, many people spend a good portion of their adulthood getting over what their parents didn't know how to fix or what to do to make things "safe". The truth is, not all parents are really "grown up" and prepared to make sure everything is right, fixed, understood, explained, and safe.

Yes, sometimes a sibling can have challenges, challenges that can even be scary and confusing, challenges that even our grown up parents don't know how to deal with, even try to disassociate from if they can. It sounds like no one was there to explain it to you and comfort you when you were frightened by it either.

I am sorry you developed PTSD from that too, but, you can heal believe it or not, it's just going to take time. I know, PTSD can be very lonely sometimes, especially when family members are not really "there" in a supportive way.

You know what I get? I get the response of "I don't want to go there, I don't want to talk about it, I am busy and I gotta go now", even been told that I better snap out of it or I will lose everything when I was in a psych ward in bad shape and in shock. Funny how one can have family around yet be incredibly lonely at the same time.

Well, you can give in, or, you can embrace it and understand it better and work at it and even decide to help others like yourself too. You are not alone with being alone with it and even having family members who don't really want to know or listen too. So, be a weed that grabs on and grows anyway, even though you have been named a weed.

(((Caring Hugs)))
OE