I was concerned about your only seeing two ends of the continuum and not seeing the spectrum but perhaps that is just a difficult concept for me to look at? I think that it is difficult to categorize people but ... maybe that is my issue.

I think that everyone must have their own definition of healthy anger. To talk to a Buddhist, there is no anger. To talk to another sanction there might be anger but it may be justified... or not depending on who is diong the judging.

I think that there have been times that I have talked of my anger in therapy and I have been told that I am justified. I have also been told by the same therapist that I am mean....at times. That hurt but it worthy of considerable examination. It also plays a major role in my marrital status.

I know I have no answers. I have a goal in life to be able to release all of this and to be at peace but that would also demand introspection to understand what is giong on around me and within me. Interesting goal ...eh. That is not to deny the anger but to deal with it appropriately.... In my mind that would be in a calmer way or more understanding way. I suppose that takes me back to Perma, by looking at the action and not the person.

Your questions are NOT stupid at all. They are all valid. The answers are illusive and you will get many different answers of what normal anger is.

Keep talking though. I believe and hope this is the current way my therapy is going.