A book that helped me alot is The Wisdom of the Enneagram. It kind of helps you understand yourself and others better.

The book doesn't necessarily help with actual trauma in your past -- that's something to tackle with a therapist or close friend -- but it does help you get perspective on yourself and figure out what's "real." And also to figure out your dynamics with other people.

Mostly ... relax. Trust your intuition. Don't react to things too fast ... take your time and give yourself space. Enjoy the process of getting to know someone, and don't put so many expectations (positive and negative) on yourself and him.