It has been 5 days, 20 hours, 51 minutes and 50 seconds and counting since my last cigarette or even vapor puff for that matter. (I have an app that helps me count).
I would had smoked at least 105 cigarettes by this time if I was still smoking.

I am wearing a patch so I am still getting nicotine (my body has not ridden of the addiction to the drug); however I am wearing step 2 instead of step 1 as directed (This due to issues in the past with step 1 and me, but step 2 is working ok). Also two weeks prior to the patch, I had cut down from my normal pack a day to about 4-7 a day.

I have attempted to quit several times in the past.... the longest I have went is a week.. I am not at a week yet but close.

My goal: is that I want to be free from smoking anything in the end. I want to be free from being a prisoner to the addiction, as I have broken from with harder drugs.
I hope I can do this, if I can-- I think with in a year, I will take the cruise I want. Actually the price of the packs I was getting, and a year- I would be able to take that cruise!

By far, cigarettes do seem to be the hardest for me to quit OR maybe I am just thinking that right now, since I am going through it. I know with a lot of other drugs I had many attempts before I finally quit-- and just like with those, and cigs now, it was something that sparked with- I really should quit for myself.

Little grouchy, but hey I got to say this:

1. I have not smoked a cig since last Friday, July 18. I have held two lit cigs, but not smoked them.
2. I went to a social gathering, which I have not done in over 7 years and I did not smoke.
3. I have had a unpleasant interactions with a few co-workers that get upset and almost want to start a fight, but I do calm down and have no cig after leaving their butts. (sorry but these two guys do antagonize, mostly everyone else I don't have this problem with)
4. I went to an interview, which was stressful- nerve racking- and I think I bombed it (did horrible) but did not smoke. I was emotional after the interview but did not smoke
5. **while in connection with 4 this is a big one for me** I have had an emotional episode with crying and thinking I am worthless-- but still Did not smoke a cigarette.
6. Others have smoked around me, and I have not smoked- some times did not want to smoke.

I read an article, and while it said, later in the stages from breaking from the addiction, to do stressful things that would make you smoke or you usually would had smoked, but not to smoke; could help with re-wiring the brain to tell it- "you don't need to smoke".

I am all about re-wiring my brain from negative things, to better things... this is just another thing to take-- One moment at a time.

After eating, I think, has actually been my biggest trigger with wanting to smoke. I know I read that a craving lasts 3 minutes,-- I am not sure if that is for all or an average.. The ones I had after eating have lasted a while, and it was not time distortion either. But that is getting better~


Anyone else want to write down stuff- feel free to.

Anyone else going through this, I wish you all the best!