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lizardlady · Jul 26, 2014, 08:15 AM

Quote:

So screw these unrealistic goals and definition set by society.

I dislike the word normal. Comfortable in your own skin should be the goal. Which sometimes involves being not "normal". Being at peace doesn't really seem "normal" or the standard lately. If you look closely.... many people are messed up, behind their fancy homes and cars.

Thanks Venus. You gave real examples of what I meant by "normal" differing from place to place. I like your goal of being comfortable in your own skin. Trying to force oneself into some ideal created by society is a sure way to be miserable.

Sister Rags, the definition of "normal" that you gave would mean anyone in the US who is low income is not "normal." I work with at risk kids from low income families. College is not a goal for most of them. Living to adulthood is a "normal" goal for them. New or late-model car? Most of them depend on public transportation. Based on that American Dream definition of "normal" none of these kids are normal. If we compare them to other kids living in the same conditions as them they are "normal."

I'm going to use a personal example of what I mean, and I believe Venus means. I have a medical condition that leaves me exhausted when I come home from work in the evening. "Normal" people do not come home so exhausted that they can not do anything other than crash on the sofa and go to bed by 8:30. I was making myself absolutely miserable berating myself for not being "normal." I should be able to come home ande do things. I should be able to stay up later than 8:30. Afterall "nornmal" people do those things. Like I said I was miserable. Then my pdoc helped me realize that this is what my body needs. This is who I am. Once I learned to be comfortable with me as me I stopped being miserable.

I find it interesting that most are defining "normal" as the middle class white ideal for the US. How many people in this country actually live that way? And of the ones who live that way, how many are happy with their lives? And what about all the people who are not white middle class. Does that mean they are not "normal?"