Hi Greenleaves
I identify with you compeltely regarding your education and sibling problems. Very similar!
I choose to focus on what I am good at and strive to exceed my personal best. I may not be where i'd like to be at this point in my life, but things could be alot worse for me.
Have you considered joining some of your city's local art groups (non-credit...painting, sculpture, cooking)? And exercising?
I hope this doesn't make you sad...but do you have any pets?
(((((((((((((((((Greenleaves))))))))))))))))))))))))