Are you in the US? I only ask because a lot of states will allow you on state health insurance if you are low-to-no-income. When I was in dire straits a few years back I managed to get insured here in Arizona and the case managers at the admittedly crappy clinic I went to asked me repeatedly if I needed a place to live. A halfway house or something sounds like it would be a huge upgrade to the situation you described above. Admittedly, if I applied again now, I don't think I'd qualify because they've become more stringent.

As far as the useless to society stuff, I have been terrible with self-loathing and worthlessness for years so I understand, to some extent, the place it comes from. I just wanted to tell you you seem very articulate and intelligent when you post here in the forums, a hell of a lot more than a lot of people in society or online. I'm starting to learn that other people can only determine our value if we let them. You seem like you have a ton to offer, just sounds like you're really having a rough time right now. It probably doesn't help any, but you do deserve to be happy and I hope things look up for you.