i understand that what people find triggering is a function of their past experiences and that different past experiences result in different triggers. i understand that people don't choose to have the triggers they do and it is not their fault that they have them and that when triggered they often feel a lot of pain.

what i fail to understand, however, is that if people know they are triggered by a discussion of porn then why on earth is it that they choose to click on and read a thread that has the term 'porn' in the title. if people know they are triggered by a photograph of a penis then why click on and look at a picture where the context of the discussion makes it clear that the picture is going to be a picture of a penis.

repetition compulsion, that is why. there is something compelling... something mesmerising... something that draws us to things that result in our feeling pain, sometimes. part of the compulsion to engage in activities likely to trigger us (e.g., reading a thread about porn or following a link to a picture of a penis) is in our desire that such things NOT trigger us. often we engage in activities that we are fairly sure are going to result in our feeling hurt because we are desperately hoping and wishing for a different ending. if i know the subject of pornography or if i know a picture of a penis is likely to trigger me i may have this compulsion to read the thread and / or to follow the link because i'm hoping and wishing for a different ending where i manage to do this and... where i don't feel triggered!

but to ask people to put a ******trigger****** warning on a thread about porn when they have already mentioned 'porn' clearly in the title... to ask people to put a ******trigger***** warning on a link to a pic of a penis when they have already stated they are posting a link to a pic of a penis...

is to undermine the value of the *******trigger****** warning.

if almost everything has a trigger warning then the trigger warning becomes meaningless as a signal. marking everything with a trigger warning ultimately is about as useful as marking nothing with a trigger warning. when people make the subject matter clear and reserve *******trigger******* for the especially likely to trigger stuff (where that may well NOT be apparent from the title / context of the discussion) isn't that most useful ultimately?

there is also the point that different people find different things triggering.

i really do wonder half the time if what people intend is to prohibit things they find triggering on this site. the trouble with that strategy is that different people find different things triggering. what can be a useful conversation for some can be a triggering conversation for others. if we couldn't discuss anything that someone or other found triggering then much of the utility of the site would be undermined...