I'm overweight, not pretty and I have no friends. I feel Luke a failure in every aspect of my life except work. I even fail at cutting-i can't make myself break the skin, I just end up with these pathetic scratches. I finally found the gut I want more than anything, he makes me actually want to live, but I mentioned to him that I thought he liked me, and he says I don't need a guy, do I'll take that as a no. I just lost my best friend because I refused to support her being with this jerk she met online who decided that I'm nothing because I'm depressed. She said that she cares about me but whenever I tried to talk to her she just seemed inconvenienced and said that talking to be was exhausting. But she obviously isn't a good friend because she abandoned me when I needed her more than anything. I thought that I was bwimg a good friend by not lying to her to make her happy. I feel like a horrible person, even though I try my best to make sure everyone else is happy. I can't deal with being alone anymore and I just wish it was all over