Ok so just a bit more info.. since I'm not sure where to put this. Got into a huge all day argument over email with my husband yesterday which continued when i got home. Then he decided that he was going to tell our kids all the gory details of what I had done to him so that when he leaves he doesn't look like the bad person. --- And well he did. he sat with them and made me sit there too and listen to his whole tirade or all my bad deeds. how I had cheated on him and posted stuff etc.. the thing though is that I had already had a quick minute to warn my kids that they were going to hear awful things about me but that in time I would get us help and we would deal with these things and I would answer any questions they had but not with their dad around. They are very close to me and this was totally awful of him to do. He always uses our kids to try to get sentiment from them and get them on his side. While i try to shield them from all this mess, specially our daughter since she's sick but he says that I'm the one shielding my self behind our kids.

So well the conversation was quiet and my son told him in out front that what ever is happening is not their business that it's an adult situation and that they had nothing to do with it. That they understand him but that this is something for adults. And for that my husband got upset & took it as the kids taking my side. The kids tried to hug him and show him love afterwards but he just pushed them away and well stressed out my kids for a while but they are ok now. I had a chance again to talk to them afterwards and they seemed calm. But I still have to keep doing more for them cause specially my daughter seemed very stressed.

I wasn't going to let him talk to the kids but I knew I wouldn't be able to persuade him so I prepared them as best as I could and then spoke to them afterwords and reassured them that no matter what happens with their dad and I that both of us love them very much and that this is not about them at all.

all this on the night before my birthday & I'm sure will continue tonight when i get home again.. ugh. wow.. life sucks sometimes.. he really makes me wish i was never born. i hate birthday's now.. .