So I'm back to how I was upbeat talkative excited everywhere. So I decided that the bit of hostility that I had yesterday was part of my (hypo)mania. I spoke to my psych nurse. Got some reassurance from him. I'm on a bit of a therapy vacation. (Had been dealing with childhood abuse, deep poop.) . I'm hesitant to tell him (psych nurse) everything going on in my head. I'm not sure what he would consider enough to have me go inpatient. When I first started talking to him he wanted me to go inpatient. I fought that and now he seems to respect my capabilities and awareness of what I'm dealing with.

I'm curious about what is deemed psychotic features. What psychotic features deem hospital stays? When is the proper time to disclose psychotic features? I don't think I'm psychotic.

So I talked to my wife about what happened yesterday trying to rationalize quitting everything associated with my mental health. And guess what she pulls out (mind you we have been best friends since 3rd grade with some drifting after she first told me how she felt about me [I was in denial about being a lesbian]) that if I quit she'd put money down that in no more than 5 years I would either be voluntarily seeing a psych team or involuntarily held in a hospital. 😦 Apparently she's seen more than I thought she had.

I'm sure there's bound to be more, but for now that's it.[emoji2]