Fuzzybear, you're self-disclosing in drips and drips , so I hear now about your unfortunate experiences of those two therapists...no wonder you have this idea that therapists can be uncaring! I would two if I were in that sitch....
I can only imagine how frightening it is for you to let go and self-disclose when there's always this fear in the back of your head that your t will not care for you through thick and thin, that when you become too much of a burden for her/him the caring will just not be there. I really hear you on that one. I hope you can find a t who can be there for you through thick and thin.