You CAN NOT help someone who WILL NOT help themselves. If they will not make some sort of an effort, you're just carrying extra weight. Sometimes you can motivate a person to take action, such as an ultimatum, (like, get help or I'm going to have to leave because this is too much for me to do on my own.) Or you can "enable" them to remain the same without consequence which will only complicate things for you, but you CAN NOT do HIS work FOR him. Each one of us need to be accountable for ourselves, otherwise things will get out of balance for everyone involved.