I am so sorry that you are hurting this badly right now.
You confided with your co-workers and they did not get it...which I am sure was equally hard to accept and not be bitter about.
If they are your friends they will stick with you and try to support you the best way that they can.
You may need to ask for help though....
Do your doctors know that you are suffering like this?
((((HUGS))))
bizi