I've spoken to both of them and they both think I should be more careful about what I write online and password protect my laptop better. Beyond that, neither thinks I should change anything for the same reasons you give. That it's giving into a certain level of neanderthal - type thinking. They've also formed opinions over the years based on what I've shared (granted only one sided) and from that would probably be concerned.

The thing is that I was very passive for the first 10 years of marriage and the whole 7 years we dated. We didn't fight at all. I am an avoidant personality and avoid conflict at all cost, even if it means sacrificing my own sanity and happiness. If something was wrong, he'd stop talking and I'd stop being sexual. I also took SSRI's for most of our time together and that does kill any romantic drive which my H does know. There was also the physical thing that I have only recently seen a doctor for.

The biggest change is now I go to graduate school and I complain. I speak up, I give him a bit of what he calls "attitude". I've written that he's old fashioned and can be a jerk. I do attribut this to a lot of the support I've gotten from my T and pdoc. He does too and this is where the "poinsoning" comes into play. If I hadn't seen them (especially him) everything would be the way it once was. Which I do not ever want back, but he does.