First off, I can't believe she holds your hand....Oh, how I wish he would hug me or hold my hand. I go back and forth with eye contact. If I am in an agitated state, I always look away and if he looks at me I snap at him telling not to look at me. I get so pissed as he tries to access me. When we are in a good, learning stage and he is really trying to convey a point, I look into his eyes because I am really trying to absorb "him" and love the feeling of his authenticity flowing into me. It's really hard to be vulnerable and share your heart. Maybe, the more time you spend in counseling, you will relax and feel safer. You may not be afraid of her, you may be afraid of "it". Think about what "it" could be.