I recall at that time I felt I had lost my identity (my false identity that is), I recall crying in therapy and in bed at night...that I am no longer the 'good' daughter I used to be (obedient and submissive), I am no longer the 'good' wife (obedient, submissive, and taking abuse), and no longer the 'good' sister (taking care of older sis)....the depth of feeling of loss is indescribable....huge....anxiety-provoking....'what do I have left,' I cried....Felt like an anihilation (sp) of self, when the truth is all those defenses were anihilating the self....
This goes back about 6-7 years ago.
The way past this is through it, to allow yourself to feel the sadness, to grieve for as long as you need to...
A book I found helpful around that time was ''Trauma of the Gifted Child'' by Alice Miller.

Takke gentle care,