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depression does that - it makes it feel like doing anything would be trying to climb Mt. Everest without gear.
have you considered medication? if therapy alone isn't helping, you may just need a kick start to your brain chemistry. honestly, you sound severely depressed to me even if you aren't suicidal.
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“It's a funny thing... but people mostly have it backward. They think they live by what they want. But really, what guides them is what they're afraid of.” ― Khaled Hosseini, And the Mountains Echoed
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