Okay, yeah, that sounds pretty familiar too. But then why might you need to have a big problem in order to make things okay? Is it not okay to be okay? If you don't mind me using myself for an example, that did turn out to be the case for me. I feel like I have to have a problem in order for anyone to care about me. My mother likes being a caretaker, and wasn't interested in letting her children grow up and be healthy. Those that do get rejected. Things start to make sense. I wonder if you have some similar motives going on in your life too.