It has been a rough year. I was with my mom when she died in march. Today I had to put my kitty asleep. I got her as a rescue when she was 4 and she was 22 when I put her down. She was in end-stage kidney failure. It hurts so bad. I miss her. I feel guilty because I couldn't stay with her when they put her to sleep. I was crying so hard and I was afraid it would upset her. She was more than a cat. She was my friend. She has been with me through everything. It is lonely without her.