I am sorry you are going through this hard time with your wife Loophole. I can say I have been the wife who didn't look in her husband's eyes, didn't smile, etc. I was going through depression and basically just going through the movements to get through the day, get through my responsibilities. I didn't feel connected to my dh or excited about life. I was just... existing. Maybe she is going through a rough spot herself. Perhaps there is a lack of connection there between you and her. When was the last time you two got a break away from the kids just to be a couple? I hope things improve for the both of you.