Thanks for the reply TheTurtleLives, It doesn't traumatize me to the point where it stops me from functioning, but I will consider seeking help if it gets worse. What's scarier is the fact that he was 'my friend', and even after the incident, we got along just fine, like normal friends. You'd the think the guilt would have made him keep his distance from me, but it did not.

It's something I remember everyday, every time I have a sexual thought, I still hate myself for not pushing this person away or screaming. I don't know if it qualifies as abuse or not, but it was certainly 'wrong'.

I don't like talking about it too much, because some people think it shaped my sexuality or something like that. I don't think that is true.