I mainly feel this very dark state of depression. Unless I've been smoking weed then usually I feel some combination of depression and loneliness. The 'bad days' are when I feel all this and then hopeless also. Most of the time I can handle it pretty calmly, but sometimes it gets to be too much and that's when I get pretty hopeless. I usually know when it's coming because I can't breathe well, there's a tightness, and it feels like a sinking weight in my stomach, like I can feel my spirits drop. I know it sounds weird, but that's what I feel inside. Don't ask me to explain happiness or contentment, those are things I know nothing about.