((((((((bellaviolet))))))))

you have a lot going for you, namely:

a) you are AWARE of your self-destructive bhvr

b) you can identify your hurt feelings

-- and --

c) i think you know how to get help; (however scary it is)

bv; we can't all bat 1000 everyday. i'm not trying to invalidate your feelings................what i'm trying to convey to you is that ppl are not always happy & smiling on the insides (as i'm sure you know).......................some are just "better" actresses & actors, i suppose................know what i mean?

comfort to you & all others who can relate.

des