Hardest thing I ever had to do in this arena was tell my pdoc after I'd overdosed on Ativan. But that was when the healing began.....he didn't judge me. Your NP won't judge you either---believe me, there's probably nothing she hasn't heard. And she can't help you if she doesn't know what's wrong.

My mother always used to say there were three people you were never supposed to lie to: your priest, your lawyer, and your doctor (or in your case, your NP). They can't do much for you if you don't tell them the whole truth. Wishing you the best.