It's not a "conscious defense" Teacake. It is very different from "lack of empathy" too.

If a person is truly expressing "empathy" then the person on the receiving end should not get "upset" by it. If one is "empathetic" it means they are "fully aware" of all weakness and can express it in a way that the other person feels "heard and comfortable". It is harder when doing it in a scenario where one doesn't "know" the person very well however or has physical tells to consider.

OE