i think I have the right to be depressed. albeit in the short term.

my gf had been accusing me for months and months of cheating when in fact I was not. after over six months of accusations I made a fake confession. fast forward a few more months. I had to leave our apartment and my daughter. and low and be hold my lie doesn't hold up. so now my girlfriend is asking for the truth since she said what I told her makes no sense. so I let her know I was telling her the truth before. of course nothing makes sense because it was a lie.

she and I have been together for 3 years. I did mess up in the beginning of our relationship but has learned from my mistakes and have been completely faithful to her for over a year and a half.

i have lost everything. shes the woman i love and I have lost her. she has stayed home with the baby and has not gone back to work yet. I worked two jobs to support us. Im down to one job but working 55 to 60 hours a week. we are sharing a car, i pay for everything.

its been three weeks since i left the apartment. i pay for everything still. i dont have access to a car, and right now I dont have the option of buying one. i was forced to move back with my father. i ride my bike to work now. i sleep in the living room.

i miss my daughter. more then anything. I have been seeing her twice a week. she is the reason why i live. she is my purpose in life. her mother is amazing with her. and I do know my hard work is paying off even tho I cant be right there for her.

my depression is starting to kick in finally. its been almost a never ending argument over this. i have an appointment with my doctor set up already. i need to take care of the depression before it gets full blown. I was stable with elevated moods for a lot longer then normal. so now its my natural mood cycle mixed in with loosing everything.

she didnt believe the truth before and she sure as hell doesnt believe the truth now. i am really angry.